Dads. Famous for their questionable fashion sense and terrible dance moves. In addition to of course the best – dad jokes. Yet despite all that, we love’em! To celebrate Fathers in your life, why not treat the special old man in your life to a lotto ticket? Or go one better and impress him with your best (worst) dad joke! We’ve compiled a list of our favourites to help you… groans are optional.
1. 5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.
2. What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1.
3. What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
4. Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
5. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
6. How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.
7. (When driving past a cemetery) “Did you know that the people living in this town aren’t allowed to be buried here?” “Why?” “Because they’re still alive.”
8. Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, “do you know how to drive this thing?”
9. Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.
10. What did one snowman say to the other one? “Do you smell carrots?”
11. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
12. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
13. What’s ET short for? Because he’s only got little legs.
14. I gave all my dead batteries away today… Free of charge.
15. My wife told me I need to quit playing Wonderwall on guitar. I said maybe…
16. What’s the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.
17. What did the daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
18. How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram.
19. What did the daddy tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!
20. What’s 50 Cent’s name in Zimbabwe? 400 Million Dollars.